A Barren Earth

RECIPE FOR A DISASTER: a healthy dose of foppish male chauvinism, equal parts of the seven deadly sins, and a self-abasing spouse. Mix them all together in a bowl with heavy helpings of conspicuous consumption, easy credit, a balloon mortgage, poverty, ignorance and disease then pour the contents over a 270 pound slab of one Ezechial Royale Orville. Slide the finished hulk into the unusually toasty oven of a special holiday and let it sit for about 24 hours, then watch what happens.